Founder's Notes

 

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Dear Angels,

This week I'm sharing Founder's Notes with two special Angels to talk about a very serious and difficult subject.  Two recent high-profile suicides of children of celebrities brought attention to a problem that affects all people, both soldiers and civilians alike.  We're hoping that in writing this we can point you as Angels to some resources for people who are hurting, and ways you can help them.

Ultimately, suicide usually deprives the world of a wonderful person who is just having a hard time, and that's something struggling people need to hear.  A blogger recently wrote: 

If you've been telling yourself that no one will miss you when you're gone, you are wrong. Your suicide would tear a hole through the future, and nothing could ever fill the space where you used to be. You might think you're alone, but you don't have to walk more than a couple of miles from your house to see a building full of people who would be delighted to meet you. There are places like Suicide Hotlines, staffed by men and women who have spent their entire lives preparing to hear the sound of your voice, and greet every day hoping to learn your name.  You may be afraid to face the years ahead. You're not the only one, and if you extinguish the light of your faith and wisdom, you consign others to darkness. 

Every day, U.S. soldiers—both combat veterans and others--try to kill themselves.  It used to be, the suicide rate among military members was much lower than age- and gender-matched civilians, but in recent years the rate has risen to nearly civilian levels.  Suicide attempts are usually related to problems with intimate relationships, but they also stem from problems related to work, finances and the law, or the long road of physical recovery from wounds.  Another difficult point can be that transition to the civilian world when a soldier loses the constant interaction with "brothers in arms" who intimately understand.

Combat veterans and wounded warriors can be particularly susceptible to suicide because their combat experiences make the line between life and death seem narrower than it does for others, and so for some of those veterans, death starts to look like an easy solution.  Other times, a suicide attempt is that classic "call for help," a way to express desperate pain that a suffering person cannot articulate and which they believe no one truly recognizes.

The U.S. military has some strong suicide-prevention programs, but what makes the biggest difference is simply one-to-one interaction with struggling heroes.  Soldiers who have lost a comrade to suicide say that they could see it coming in retrospect, but they either missed the signs or didn't believe what they were seeing.  They are also very frustrated, wishing they had told the soldier, "I know it's pain and suffering, but it's nothing we couldn't help you with.  After all the tough and amazing things we've done together, beating 'this' is so doable!"

That togetherness is so important.  Ultimately, some suicides cannot be prevented.  But other times, just being there and taking a friend by the hand to someone who can help will make all the difference.  If you know someone who is struggling, you can refer them to MilitaryOneSource.com for anonymous and free counseling, or have them call the military suicide prevention line at 1-800-273-TALK.  You can even contact these resources yourself on someone's behalf.  Help, from people who understand veterans, is literally a phonecall away.

As Angels, let's keep our eyes open both on the military and civilian sides, watching for people who are going through tough times.  Our veterans are strong and courageous people with huge hearts; we've leaned on them for protection and safety.  Let's make sure they know they can lean on us, now.

Although we cannot save everyone, we all need to do our part to always stand wingtip-to wingtip with our nation's finest citizens: the warriors that day in and day out provide freedom for all of us.   Let's make sure we help them make that freedom worth living.

Wingtip-to-wingtip,

Patti Patton-Bader, Toby Nunn and Shelle Michaels

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